WILL I HAVE TO WORK THE 12 STEPS?
We are a 12 Step based sober living house. Therefore, we take the unique approach that people wishing to live in sober living, should actually be working the 12 steps. Why is this seemingly common sense approach unique? Because we've not yet been able to find another sober living house that requires this or verifies that it is occurring in it's membership.
We are not called "Into Action" by accident. Like the name implies, members are required (and is verified) to:
We are a 12 Step based sober living house. Therefore, we take the unique approach that people wishing to live in sober living, should actually be working the 12 steps. Why is this seemingly common sense approach unique? Because we've not yet been able to find another sober living house that requires this or verifies that it is occurring in it's membership.
We are not called "Into Action" by accident. Like the name implies, members are required (and is verified) to:
- Attend a minimum number of 12 Step Meetings (number required based on what Phase a member has reached.)
- Obtaining a Sponsor within one week of moving in.
- Working with their Sponsor at least 3-4 times per week.
- Studying 12 Step literature.
- Making regular progress on the 12 Steps.
WILL I HAVE TO ATTEND AA MEETINGS?
Our house members may attend any 12 Step program they wish. HOWEVER, only AA meetings will count towards the weekly meeting quota. However, the weekly meeting quota can also be partially met by attending religious services (like church / bible studies / etc.), counseling, addiction training, and other court ordered requirements. Our goal is not to overwhelm your schedule, but rather keep you active in your own recovery.
*Church attendance is not mandatory. However, if a member is religiously minded, our Phase and Points system does encourage it. Just one example: Church (or other religious service) also counts towards a member's meeting quota.
WHY AA MEETINGS SPECIFICALLY?: (If this isn't an issue for you, then feel free to skip the rest of this page.)
BUT I'M A DRUG ADDICT. DOES AA WORK FOR ADDICTS? CAN I EVEN GO TO AN AA MEETING?:
1. Good news. So is every singlel alcoholic. Alcoholics are addicted to the chemical drug CH3CH2OH (ethanol) as opposed to chemical drug C21H23NO5 (heroin).
2. In 20 years of attending meetings, we've never seen one meeting where if someone pulled out a joint, or snorted a line of cocaine that they would be considered sober.
3. (Quick Note: The Big Book is the primary 'text book' that AA uses. It is affectionately referred to as the "Big Book" by AA members and contains the instructions for the 12 Steps.) There is a statement in the Big Book that says, "Remember that we deal with alcohol - cunning, baffling, and powerful". Some people go so far as to say this means that "AA only deals with alcohol". And some even go so far as to say it means that any drug other than alcohol should never even be mentioned. Fortunately for those addicted to other chemical formulas other than CH3CH2OH, this understanding of that statement is completely false. Why?
4. Further, the Big Book clearly states that "alcohol is but a symptom." There can be many symptoms to a condition. Alcohol is one symptom of alcoholism. Using drugs, decisions based on fear and resentment are all other forms of symptoms of alcoholism.
5. Does that mean we sit there and rattle on about drugs drugs drugs in an AA meeting? No. We respect AA and want to keep it as it is for the next person who is suffering down the road. So we observe the tradition to keep our talk of drugs limited, just as the founders did.
6. The word "use, used, or using" apply to alcohol the same way as to drugs. In fact, in our opinion, it applies even better than "drink, drank, or drinking".
7. If you're not comfortable saying "using" in a meaning though, no problem. Just replace it with "drinking". For example, S.A. (Sexaholics Anonymous) says "drinking in" a woman to illustrate for example, a man's mental lust toward a woman he see's walking by.
"Open" AA meetings are not limited to strictly "alcoholics" and there are plenty of those if you really have an issue calling yourself an alcholic.
8. AA's Third Tradition states: "The only requirement for AA membership is a desire to stop drinking." It does not say you must never speak about drugs, or swear you are more addicted to alcohol than drugs. It merely says, if you wish you could stop doing the symptoms of alcoholism, of which one is drinking, then you're in the right spot.
9. If alcohol is "but a symptom", then what's the condition? "A seemingly hopeless condition of mind and body, a malady, which only a spiritual experience will conquer. Same thing for drugs.
***To any AA members or other 12 Step groups reading this, please don't get us wrong, we absolutely love and respect AA and it's traditions. We are NOT condoning going into an AA meeting and trying to fundamentally change AA and all it stands for by talking about a bunch of drug use or identifying as an addict, etc. We overwhelmingly agree that talk about drugs should be very limited in scope to protect the structure of AA. But we also don't feel that it should somehow proclude mentioning drugs if they are in someone's story, nor that it should be a hinderance to someone attending meetings who is newly arriving to our sober living that is based on strenght through numbers and action.
Our house members may attend any 12 Step program they wish. HOWEVER, only AA meetings will count towards the weekly meeting quota. However, the weekly meeting quota can also be partially met by attending religious services (like church / bible studies / etc.), counseling, addiction training, and other court ordered requirements. Our goal is not to overwhelm your schedule, but rather keep you active in your own recovery.
*Church attendance is not mandatory. However, if a member is religiously minded, our Phase and Points system does encourage it. Just one example: Church (or other religious service) also counts towards a member's meeting quota.
WHY AA MEETINGS SPECIFICALLY?: (If this isn't an issue for you, then feel free to skip the rest of this page.)
- Our homes are in Oklahoma City and Edmond. We mean no disrespect to any other 12 step group! But we simply feel that in OKC and Edmond that AA is a much stronger program. First, AA has substantially more meetings. But in our experience, AA generally has more members with longer & healthier sobriety. By contrast, in certain parts of rural Oklahoma, NA is not only often a stronger program, but is sometimes the only program available. But our homes are not in rural Oklahoma.
- Part of the strength of our house is that everyone in it is working the same program and from the same original proven text book. If members all attended different 12 step groups, then we would not have the strength or cohesion that allows us to foster stronger sobriety within our house.
- In no way do we forbid other types of anonymous groups. We only specify that the quota should be met with AA meetings.
BUT I'M A DRUG ADDICT. DOES AA WORK FOR ADDICTS? CAN I EVEN GO TO AN AA MEETING?:
1. Good news. So is every singlel alcoholic. Alcoholics are addicted to the chemical drug CH3CH2OH (ethanol) as opposed to chemical drug C21H23NO5 (heroin).
2. In 20 years of attending meetings, we've never seen one meeting where if someone pulled out a joint, or snorted a line of cocaine that they would be considered sober.
3. (Quick Note: The Big Book is the primary 'text book' that AA uses. It is affectionately referred to as the "Big Book" by AA members and contains the instructions for the 12 Steps.) There is a statement in the Big Book that says, "Remember that we deal with alcohol - cunning, baffling, and powerful". Some people go so far as to say this means that "AA only deals with alcohol". And some even go so far as to say it means that any drug other than alcohol should never even be mentioned. Fortunately for those addicted to other chemical formulas other than CH3CH2OH, this understanding of that statement is completely false. Why?
- AA deals with tons of items other than "only alcohol". Issues ranging from prayer and resentments to sex and money.
- Further, the Big Book clearly states that "alcohol is but a symptom." There can be many symptoms to a condition. Alcohol is one symptom of alcoholism. Using drugs, decisions based on fear and resentment are all other forms of symptoms of alcoholism.
- The founders themselves talk about drugs in their own story in the Big Book. In fact, they explain how they only really 'hit bottom' once they began using drugs!
4. Further, the Big Book clearly states that "alcohol is but a symptom." There can be many symptoms to a condition. Alcohol is one symptom of alcoholism. Using drugs, decisions based on fear and resentment are all other forms of symptoms of alcoholism.
5. Does that mean we sit there and rattle on about drugs drugs drugs in an AA meeting? No. We respect AA and want to keep it as it is for the next person who is suffering down the road. So we observe the tradition to keep our talk of drugs limited, just as the founders did.
6. The word "use, used, or using" apply to alcohol the same way as to drugs. In fact, in our opinion, it applies even better than "drink, drank, or drinking".
7. If you're not comfortable saying "using" in a meaning though, no problem. Just replace it with "drinking". For example, S.A. (Sexaholics Anonymous) says "drinking in" a woman to illustrate for example, a man's mental lust toward a woman he see's walking by.
"Open" AA meetings are not limited to strictly "alcoholics" and there are plenty of those if you really have an issue calling yourself an alcholic.
8. AA's Third Tradition states: "The only requirement for AA membership is a desire to stop drinking." It does not say you must never speak about drugs, or swear you are more addicted to alcohol than drugs. It merely says, if you wish you could stop doing the symptoms of alcoholism, of which one is drinking, then you're in the right spot.
9. If alcohol is "but a symptom", then what's the condition? "A seemingly hopeless condition of mind and body, a malady, which only a spiritual experience will conquer. Same thing for drugs.
***To any AA members or other 12 Step groups reading this, please don't get us wrong, we absolutely love and respect AA and it's traditions. We are NOT condoning going into an AA meeting and trying to fundamentally change AA and all it stands for by talking about a bunch of drug use or identifying as an addict, etc. We overwhelmingly agree that talk about drugs should be very limited in scope to protect the structure of AA. But we also don't feel that it should somehow proclude mentioning drugs if they are in someone's story, nor that it should be a hinderance to someone attending meetings who is newly arriving to our sober living that is based on strenght through numbers and action.
WHY WILL I BE REQUIRED TO WORK THE 12 STEPS?
SHORT VERSION: In Our Own Words
- The Problem: The addicted person is unable to remain abstinent.
- The Solution: A complete psychic change (a spiritual experience / awakening) which results in actually removing the desire/craving as well as the fear of not using/drinking.
- The Treatment: Completing and the continued integration of the 12 steps into the addicted person's life.
- The Action: Each day that a "sober" (or in other words 'dry') person delays the treatment means another day without the medicine necessary to overcome a progressive illness. So to prevent a relapse, it's simple: Complete the 12 steps the first time through as quickly as possible just as the Big Book suggests and integrate the 12 steps as a way of life.
LONGER VERSION: In the Words of the Big Book of AA
THE PROBLEM:
Why does a person use like an alcoholic / addict?
THE SOLUTION:
THE TREATMENT:
THE ACTION:
THE PROBLEM:
Why does a person use like an alcoholic / addict?
- “(They) drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol." (BB pg. xxviii)
- "We know that while the alcoholic keeps away from drink, as he may do for months or years, he reacts much like other men. We are equally positive that once he takes any alcohol whatever into his system, something happens, both in the bodily and mental sense, which makes it virtually impossible for him to stop." (BB pg. 22)
- "These observations would be academic and pointless if our friend never took the first drink, thereby setting the terrible cycle in motion. Therefore the main problem of the alcoholic centers in his mind, rather than in his body." (BB pg. 23)
- After they have succumbed to the desire again (drinking - causing the allergic reaction), as so many do, the phenomenon (obsession of the mind) of craving develops." (BB pga
- “If, when you honestly want to, you find you cannot quit entirely, or if when drinking, you have little control over the amount you take, you are probably alcoholic." (BB pg. 44)
- “If that be the case, you may be suffering from an illness which only a spiritual experience will conquer… And "we had to face the fact that we must find a spiritual basis of life—or else." (BB pg. 44)
- Most of us have entered the final stage with its commitment to health resorts, sanitariums, hospitals, and jails. Sometimes there were screaming delirium and insanity. Death was often near. (BB pg. 107)
- To be doomed to an alcoholic death or to live on a spiritual basis are not always easy alternatives to face. (BB pg. 44)
- "Lack of power, that was our dilemma. We had to find a power by which we could live, and it had to be a Power greater than ourselves. Obviously. But where and how were we to find this Power? Well, that's exactly what this book is about. Its main object is to enable you to find a Power greater than yourself which will solve your problem." (BB pg. 45)
THE SOLUTION:
- "When the spiritual malady is overcome, we straighten out mentally (the obsession of them mind) and physically (the allergy of the body). (BB pg. 64)
- Unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery. (BB pg. xxix)
THE TREATMENT:
- Nothing short of continuous action upon these as a way of life can bring the much-desired result. (12x12 pg. 40)
- Step 12 - Having had a spiritual awakening as a result of (ALL) these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics, and to practice these principles in all our affairs." (BB pg 60)
THE ACTION:
- “(The alcoholic) "should realize that we are engaged upon a life-and-death errand.” (BB pg. 75)
- “Unless each A.A. member follows to the best of his ability our suggested Twelve Steps to recovery, he almost certainly signs his own death warrant.” (12x12 pg. 174)
- “If an alcoholic failed to perfect and enlarge his spiritual life through work and self-sacrifice for others, he could not survive the certain trials and low spots ahead.” (BB pg. 15)
- "It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels." (BB pg. 85)
- “Half measures availed us nothing. We stood at the turning point. We asked His protection and care with complete abandon.” (BB pg. 59)
- "The program of action, though entirely sensible, was pretty drastic." (BB pg 42)
- “By now the newcomer has probably arrived at the following conclusions: that his character defects, representing instincts gone astray, have been the primary cause of his drinking and his failure at life; that unless he is now willing to work hard at the elimination of the worst of these defects, both sobriety and peace of mind will still elude him; that all the faulty foundation of his life will have to be torn out and built anew on bedrock.” (12x12 pg. 50)
- So... "Next, we launched out on a course of vigorous action." (BB pg 63)
- “There is action and more action.” (BB pg. 88)
- “Many of us exclaimed, ‘What an order! I can’t go through with it.’ Do not be discouraged. No one among us has been able to maintain anything like perfect adherence to these principles. We are not saints. The point is, that we are willing to grow along spiritual lines. The principles we have set down are guides to progress. We claim spiritual progress rather than spiritual perfection.” (BB pg. 60)
- "It is easy to let up on the spiritual program of action and rest on our laurels. We are headed for trouble if we do, for alcohol is a subtle foe. We are not cured of alcoholism. What we really have is a daily reprieve contingent on the maintenance of our spiritual condition." (BB pg. 85)
- (The promises of AA) are being fulfilled among us--sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. They will always materialize if we work for them. (BB pg 84)
- "Nothing short of continuous action upon these as a way of life can bring the much-desired result." (12&12 pg 40)
- "Unless each A.A. member follows to the best of his ability our suggested Twelve Steps to recovery, he almost certainly signs his own death warrant." (12&12 pg 17)